Her Own Space

I'm so excited I just can't hide it (Yeah I know, that sounds very 90's) that I was able to blog again after just 2 weeks! Yay! I feel this story is something so notable in my diary I just gotta write.

The past weeks, Sophie had been coaxing us to transform the other room into her own room. For a while, we weren't paying much attention. We co-sleep with both kids and honestly I can do that until they're both grown up and just abhor the thought of still sleeping with their mom. Honestly, the little girl's request didn't run through me that easy. I admitted I had bouts of separation anxiety when there were nights she slept in the other room even without her bed yet.

When friends asked how I got Sophie to like sleeping on her own, I had no answer. It was all her idea, she really has a mind of her own even as a toddler so all the credit to the little girl.

She's 7 and should have a room of her own but this poor mommy cannot endure the idea of sleeping without the kids. Their smell, their foot on my tummy and saliva-smeared faces are like my security blanket. They make the bed cozier and sleep sounder at night. On the first few nights that she slept in the other room I couldn't sleep, waiting for her to knock on the door and 'sleep with Mommy.'

We know we need to give in to a plea that had all the right reasons so 2 weeks ago we bought a double bed for the kids that's convertible to 2 single beds. The other bed's for the little boy because we now know, sadly, 'that day' will come :(

Both kids were so excited with their new lair. The little girl immediately prepped her space with all her kikay stuff and toys. She's so giddy and I started to feel excited for her too. I know this is what she wanted and there's no denying that. Now, she said, all it lacks is an AC. Yeah...right.

So this thing really comes to parents with 7 year olds along with teeth falling out and permanent ones erupting and all the other physical changes going on, friends evolving from toddlers and kids to preteen bffs. Stop! Wait! Prrrrt! I don't think I'm ready yet little girl. You're growing up too fast.

p.s.: Just so I won't get another shock, I asked the little boy if he's ready to sleep in the other room with her Ate Sophie. He said no and I know he really means NO (he wants to sleep with Mommy). What a relief :)

Home Service Victim

That’s me. My nails were done without my consent so I fall into the category of victim. Right?

Here’s the story.

After our Sunday lunch at home, I went for a nap with the kids. Yeah, buhay baboy on a weekend. Geez, I never thought making kare-kare for the very first time could be so exhausting.

I was so tired I went to sleep faster than I knew it and didn’t know that the kids didn’t go to sleep immediately. After a few minutes of snooze, I felt something sharp poking on my toes. I thought I was dreaming but when I opened my eyes, I realized what was happening. The little girl was giving me a pedicure!

She somehow got hold of nail polish set box. She was pushing my blue nail polish out of my pitiful toes. She’s obviously deep into the task that I didn’t bother complain. I was too sleepy anyway so I guess I’m a willing victim after all.

After painting my toe nails, she did a little ‘massage’ and moved on to my hands. Haha! This is what she came up with. I forgot I bought this

polish but it was so cute I wore it for a weak. Just filled in some blank spots.

I always bring the little girl with me to the salon and we spend foot spa bonding time every now and then so I guess she knows the drill.

This is just a peek on my life with a kikay daughter. Most times I’m also a victim of make up tutorials or hair styling :0 

A Mom's Special Treat

What we did on Mother's Day was truly special for me. Thanks to hubby for the 3D/2N staycation treat in Makati's One Greenbelt Hotel. It's a small hotel, more of traveler's hotel but checking in there made it breezier to go through all our planned activities for Mother's Day and voting on May 13.

 

Thanks too to my two ultra sweet and hyper active kids who kept surprising me with a Happy Mother's day greeting - they came out from the hotel's closet and surprised me, I got into the car and they 'surprised' me (or so they thought), we were eating dinner at a restaurant and they continued to shout 'Happy Mother's Day Mommy!'. I felt Mother's Day every minute, every step of the way. As I write this they still greet me. I think this thing is going to be month long.

 I told you my kids love to celebrate. When I'm 8 months away from my birthday, they give me a happy birthday card and surprised me as soon as I got home from work. Every week, we get a Happy Valentine's Day greeting from them. Haha!

We were yayaless in the hotel and those with toddlers will know how busy it can get. Busy being an understatement but kids just kept cracking me up with their antics and funny stories so that compensate. BIG TIME. Sam kept on suggesting we stay there FOREVER. Big word right? He decided in the end that he still likes our house :)

Our hotel. Just a stone throw away from Greenbelt malls.

 

Kids slept soundly, it was so hard to make them get up for breakfast

 

We also got to try the much raved about Bibingka souffle in Solace, the adjacent resto of the hotel. You got to try this one. I think I can finish 3 orders. 

On morning of Mother's Day, we walked from the hotel to the nearest breakfast joint...in our PJs! So liberating! That is definitely off my bucket list :)

After breakfast, we walked again to our fave bookstore. Here's the little boy in his Thomas and Friends PJs picking out a book.

I miss the south so much. Don't get me wrong, I love our crib. I got my garden and all plus it's proximity to work is such a convenience. The south, well, it's where my family is, it's got my fave malls and the place is just homey (for me) . I discovered, though, that  despite not living here for almost a decade now I still know the place like the back of my hand.

We celebrated Mother's Day with all the other great Moms in my life. We visited both my Mom and sister and my in-laws. Brought Chocolat's Death by Tablea cakes for the ladies. This cake is  starting to climb up in our list of fave cakes. They just opened a branch in Palanan, Makati City.

I got another Mother's Day treat 'ya know. It came as a surprise. I ♥ stocks. You earn without a sweat. Another one on my bucket list is to buy moorrreee stocks.

Every time this special day comes I feel so proud to be part of the celebration.

I remember the first year I got Mother's Day greetings on FB and on my mobile phone I was still on maternity leave and I felt so overwhelmed for all the greetings it brought tears to my eyes (very rare occasion for me). I don't know why. I guess I didn't expect it to be that special. Maybe it was the postpartum issues, all the pain (of breastfeeding and recovery from CS) or sleep deprivation that made me cry over simple text messages from families and friends.

 It could be that surge of UNCONDITIONAL love for a stranger in my arm whom I met for just a few months. How that is even possible is still a mystery to me. My world was turned 360 degrees by these little gifts I now call Sophie and Sam but I succumb with an open heart. A mother and child bond is really a magical thing.

Being a mom and going through the everyday learning experience is both humbling and enriching for me. I know I have a lot to learn and improve as a mentor, a leader, a good example, a friend and all other roles that I need to play. So much the responsibility and expectations. Nevertheless, I know that having kids and having a partner like hubby inspires me be better and to be thankful everyday.

Happy Mother's Day to all the great moms out there !

Sam is two years old now. Yes, he has officially landed the terrible two stage. Actually, as with Sophie, his mischievous spirit and pagka-hyper emerged a couple of months before he turned two. I think it’s a phase that helps prepare mommies for the year two that’s gonna be really challenging! Prelude to war, if I may say so:0

For me, this moment is also an opportunity to instill in children discipline. I am anticipating that because he is a boy, he’s gonna be more makulit than his Ate (big sister) so I am also gearing up on how to discipline a super cranky, hyperactive and overdramatic little boy. Everything is superlative with a two-year old child! But don’t worry, he still is the sweetest little boy; he loves to shower mom, dad, ate, lolo and lolas with kisses and hugs. He still loves it when we hold hands as we walk J I know that at his age he is trying out his independence but he knows that he is still mommy’s baby boy.

Terrible two is challenge and also an opportunity for parents. For those who have kids that are going through this stage, I think we first need to understand some things about toddlers this age:

1. This is a rite of passage for toddler. They really have no intention of being defiant; they are trying out their independence but can’t easily express it.
2. In relation to number two, they get frustrated and may have mood swings or tantrums if they adults can’t understand what they want to do or if they can’t get something done the way they imagine it. Example:

sam: alis sam, dito

mommy:  where?

sam: dito! (pointing afar)

mommy: dito na tayo. where do you want to go?

sam:  dito! bibli dandin. bibli barney (there! let’s buy candy. let’s buy barney)

mommy:  oh, ok. sorry honey, didn’t understand you agad.

sam: mommy chulit (mommy kulit).

Si mommy pa ang makulit.

3. It can occur even immediately after their first birthday or a few months before their 2^nd birthday
4. No is their favorite word. For Sam, it’s No, Hindi and Ayaw but if he agrees he says Otei or Opo J Trick no. 1 : craft your statement in way that will make them say yes so it will turn out to be a positive conversation. Toddlers can be conversant at this age but they have their own language. The trick is to decipher or translate their language so that adults will understand. I listen to Sam as much as I can when he talk his talk then ask him if such word means this or that so I can immediately decipher his new word. Everyday he has a new word or two so it’s important to keep up to him or you both get lost in translation.  
5. Because they are practicing their independence, they will insist on helping out with the chores or some tasks which could lead to frustration if they can’t do it right. This could also be a frustrating moment for the parent but please try not to throw a tantrum before your child does.
6. At this age, setting out a routine and following it is very important. It’s one part of instilling discipline in schedule.
7. At this age, I was able to get Sophie into cooking. She wanted so much to help out in the kitchen so I introduced her to simple tasks like breading the chicken or beating the egg. I also taught her how to fold her shirts, towels,etc. Toddlers likes to mimic adults so grab this opportunity teach them a few chores while they have a genuine interest for it.

Several months back I know that Sam is also ready to be potty trained. Although I was hoping that, like Ate, he’d be 100% off diaper by age 2. But each child is different and Sam is learning how to say when he wants to go to the loo but at bedtime he still wears his diaper. We will get there in time. 

A Mommy Worries

I’m sleep-deprived and busy taking care of my sick baby for how many days now. My baby boy has been with fever since Monday afternoon. We started giving him Paracetamol but come Wednesday night when his fever reached 39.9degree Celsius we decided to bring him to the hospital already. We got to the FEU ER by midnight and the doctors checked on Sam and took a blood sample from him. This is one of the procedures that I really hate but I know is important to rule out Dengue or any other scary diseases. I’m not the type of mom who prefers to leave the room during these kind of procedures but when the doctor stuck the the needle in search of the right vein, I was silently praying ‘Dear God, please help him find it quick’ because Sam was already crying so hard. I know he was crying so hard because 1) he’s being pinned down and 2) for the needle in his arm, in that order. He doesn’t cry when the doctor checks his ears, his throat or his tummy but when you pin him down he cries so much. They also need a urine sample from him to rule out UTI so we also have to put a wee bag on him which irritated him a lot. He kept crying ‘Mommy’ ‘mommy’ and was pointing to his diaper because he wants it removed.

Come 3:15 am, we finally got blood test result and it showed he has normal platelet count and hemotocrit is normal also. Thank God! No urine sample by that time but we’re really dead tired and wanted to go home so we just signed a document with a promise to be back as soon as the specimen is available. Anyway, the urine test showed normal result also so the verdict: it's viral. Super thank you God!

You see, we just came from the ER last week because of Sam’s diarrhea (something he ate or drank at a restaurant). He was given antibiotic for a week then we were instructed to go back Tuesday or Wednesday for follow up check. We were definitely back but for a different reason this time.

I don’t know if I already shared this here but my little boy is really one of my greatest worries because he is more of the fragile and susceptible to illness. He was diagnosed with high bilirubin level or what we normally call jaundice when he was born. Although jaundice is normal to new borns (since their liver is not yet functioning at optimum level), his case was somehow beyond normal level,thus, we stayed in the hospital another few days after I gave birth. They had to put him under phototherapy treatment (ultraviolet and infrared) which they setup in our room for 24hrs. I had to pump my milk because, ideally, he doesn’t have to get off the light even for milk. My husband and I alternately looked after him and made sure he doesn’t remove his eye cover (so as not to damage his eyes) and that he was turned every now and then for his body to get even exposure to the light. It was difficult for me that we had to turn him on his stomach because he was a day old then and he may find it hard to breath so I watched him like a hawk even if I’m tired myself from giving birth. What’s extremely difficult for me is the acceptance of the situation. Being a mom, we always wish the best for our kids but when trials like this come our way, my initial reaction is to blame myself and question myself why situations like these happen. I was asking God for forgiveness and mercy the whole time I was in the hospital. Thankfully, after the phototherapy session they took another test on him and his condition improved. The morning sun is enough follow through medication for him.

during  the phototherapy session at Manila Doctors Hosp.

At one month old, he developed a skin disorder called dermatitis. When I observed him for several weeks, I realized that exposure to pollen and dust triggers the allergy. The doctor said that if an allergy like this doesn’t go away after a couple of years, it may develop into full blown asthma. Another scary scenario for me. He was under steroid medication for a couple of weeks and lots of creams for months and months. All stuffed toys and linens that may trigger his allergy were stashed away and we can’t bring him to the playground L We also had to make sure he doesn’t scratch his face so as not to worsen his sometimes crusty red face. With God’s grace, he was given a gift of healing by the time he turned one. He can now play with any stuff toy he wants or go to the playground anytime there’s a good weather.

I guess the last and most difficult for me as a mom was when both my kids were diagnosed with Primary Complex. This is basically TB in kids. Sam, being the more fragile and younger (I guess) of the two, got Pneumonia which is, according to the doctor, an onset / effect of PC. They got it from their yaya. I was so devastated when I found out about this that I was thinking of quitting work and just take care of my kids myself. However, people around me who knew how I love my career and that how much we need the perks from my job now more than ever discouraged me on this option. My mom and my boss who is also a mom were my constant advisers and guides during this time. Apart from them, I found it difficult to share at first to my other friends but eventually I was able to accept that something like this may become a part of motherhood. I somehow opened up to some other friends. I thank them for their support and encouragement. By sharing also I realized how many other parents have gone through this phase since this is quite common in our country. The treatment took 6months which is the minimum treatment for PC and it was a really a trying 6months because we have to make sure they take their medication every single day and we have monitor their weight gain because during their PC stage, their appetite diminished and lost several pounds. This is one reason I’m glad I kept my job - the hospital bills, checkups and medication were covered by my company benefits. Our yaya, maybe out of guilt, decided to go back home no matter how much we tried to let her stay (she was a good yaya anyway). We were worried that she will not take medication and just let it be, that’s dangerous for her. One friend suggested that, in the future, maybe it’s better to let the helpers undergo medical checkup before we accept them. This is also a good suggestion but the problem is, if they’re already under our employment, we can't really dictate where they go or who they interact with on their day off. I can’t let them take the xray test every after day off. Maybe a quarterly check up is necessary,though. 

Sam at 2 months

When I found out I was pregnant with a boy, I remember my very first prayer to God was that He makes me a mother who is fair and just to my two kids. A mother who will provide equal nurturing, discipline, compassion and love to my two kids. I adore my 1st born to the hilt and I was happy then with just a little girl. Then, I got pregnant again and my first worry was that I may not be able to love him as much as I love my princess. But God has a way of making things work for all of us and I guess this is His way of saying ' you will never miss this little guy, he will keep you busy' (or that's just my interpretation of the situations). In a nutshell, I'm happy and thankful that Sam is generally a healthy boy. He was able to surpass all medical conditions he went through and remained a happy and smart little boy. I love him with all my life as much as I love my little girl.