The Gift of Forgiveness and Healing

If I wrote this post right after the accident, it would start with ‘why!why!why!’ or ‘life is so unfair.’Full of questions and negativity.

But that’s not how this post will run now. That’s not how I view the accident,in retrospect. We've moved on and looking at the bright side.

The gruesome accident involved my son Sam who accidentally punctured his left eye with a metal headband (he was playing alone and got hold of his Ate’s headband) and damaged part of his iris. It took the doctors almost 3 hours to save his eye. 

It was the most grueling 3 hours of my life and I didn't know then which hurt more – the waiting during the operation or being at the OR before the procedure to see my son being sedated prior to operation. At one point it was very thoughtful of the doctors to let me in the operating room because they wanted Sam to see me before he got knocked out by the meds so I immediately agreed but I wasn't prepared emotionally to see the prep procedure. I tried to remain strong and held back my tears for my son.

As the operation went on, I sat alone inside the hospital’s chapel and prayed while my husband waited inside the room waiting for news of the procedure. The amount of tears, the heart-wrenching pain we had to endure as a family, all the agony, it was so surreal and yet so real. As much I wished it was all a bad dream, it wasn’t. I thought I’ll go crazy! 

I prayed for my son’s safety, to bless the doctors who were operating on him, to provide our family with strength, with guidance and with humility to accept whatever He has planned for us.

I just had to ask why although I know we should never question the Lord but I pray for his understanding at that point. A mom who loves his children more than life itself was going through the most traumatic experience. I knew he understood me and heard my plea. 

In between my bouts of cries, I heard this message and it was spot on: 

‘Do not worry about Sam, I will take care of him. I promise you he will be okay. You must never worry and trust that I will take care of everything.’ Just like the sun on a summer sky, the message (and the voice) was clear and it was the most consoling words I heard. God never fails to give refuge to sorrowful hearts. 

Inner turmoil was another hurdle I had to overcome.

After our almost 1 week stay in the hospital after the operation, I took another week off from work to personally take care of him as he continued to recuperate. I was critical over so many things, overly critical if I may say so.  I was critical of the kids’ activities (Sam can’t jump, run, carry heavy things or any strenuous activity), of the things at home that may cause anymore danger even if it doesn't look it (who would've thought an innocent headband can do that to the eye) and most especially of the people who I entrusted to take care of the children while my husband and I work. I was full of criticisms, anger and distrust of anything, of anyone. I was more traumatized than my son, I think.

I was full of negativity but I knew I had to fight it. It was starting to consume me.

I read through chapters of the Bible and pages of devotional books hoping to find guidance and solace. To find the strength to forgive and to move on. Then His message came one day: 

‘If you seek complete healing for your son, you need to be able to forgive. Forgive the people around you and forgive yourself. With anger comes negativity and you must never allow these two in your home. You need to forgive in order to be forgiven, in order to receive the healing’.

The messages I received during those challenging weeks were so to the point and enlightening and I know that I need to obey. There is no other way although it wasn't the easy path.

Sam has regained his eyesight, not yet at 20/20 vision and he’s still on medication. Our regular visits have been cut down from weekly to monthly. He is scheduled for suture removal in the coming weeks which is good news as it means the wound has completely healed. All throughout the process, almost everything was covered by the HMO and medicine allowance provided by our company which another thing to be thankful for. 

God really is a miracle maker and a great provider. If we surrender everything to Him and listen to His message, His will make everything possible for us. 

By now, I can share this story with you. I feel that God has helped us to move on from this traumatic experience. I'm also thankful for the doctors and nurses who took care of Sam. They are the best and made sure my son was well taken care of.  His ophtha doctor Dr. Alejo is the best; so patient, so caring, visiting Sam even on Father's Day. Great thanks also to my family, friends, colleagues who sent messages, gifts and prayers. The simplest text message of encouragement went a long way. 

 I love this quote, it's so apt. 

source

p.s. pardon the long absence, you see my hands are full the past months. Hope the next blog post won't be 4 months from now :)

Baon Ideas for School Kids

I have mentioned in my previous post that I enjoy preparing the kids’ baon. The previous school years I wasn’t able to do this much because of my work schedule; I was tied to giving instructions to the helpers lang. Now with a fixed schedule I get to prep the kids' school stuff including their baons. 

Planning kids’s school snacks/meal is no easy task. It’s the same way as planning the family weekly menu. I’ve been doing it for 8 years now and boy, sometimes I just run out of ideas. You need a lot of brainstorming and research so meals won’t redundant and so that you’re sure the family gets enough nutrition.

Here are what I prepared for Sophie and Sam’s baon yesterday. Before I took a bath I made these:

Happy face mini-pizzas made of 2 types cheeses (quezo de bola and quickmelt cheese), ham and olive oil. I decorated with a little ketchup to make the eyes, nose and mouth. Easy to do and fun to eat. Who doesn’t love pizza anyway? :

these babies are ready for the oven 

use this to make catsup eyes and mouth

I also packed ‘em snacks with bread sticks, wafers and nuts. This goes alongside slices of crunchy, juicy apples :) For the drinks, we send them juice boxes every now and then but not too often. Water is always the best way to go.

party mix for baon with wafers, crackers and mixed nuts

Other baon options to share with you in case you run out of ideas (just as I sometimes do):

1. Pancakes. Create a smiley face or draw a flower (or their fave character like train for my little boy) on the pancakes using melted chocolates or pack with a fat free maple syrup in a small container.
2. Quick pasta cooked with olive oil, finely chopped fresh basil, onions, seasoned with salt and pepper. My little ones like it with scrambled egg. I use fresh basil instead of dried because the kids prefer it that way. You can also make kids spaghetti with meat sauce, carbonara or mac and cheese.
3. Chicken or fish fingers or nuggets (depending on how you cut the chicken/fish fillet). Make homemade nuggets which are way healthier than the store bought packed nuggets. Just combine evap milk, flour, eggs, salt and pepper to make a batter and coat the chicken/fish slices with batter. Before cooking, I dust the nuggets with a little cornstarch for more crunch. You can either fry or bake the nuggets.
4. Quesadillas – so easy to make with just flour tortillas spread with olive oil, mozarella cheese and some veggies like spinach or fresh basil. Grill them and they’re ready to go! See my post here.
5. Make ahead viands – could be adobo or pork steak. Just last Thursday, my daughter brought pork sinigang (pork tamarind soup) for baon. Haha! She loves my sinigang cooked with boiled real tamarind.
6. Fluffy shrimp cakes – recipe here.
7. Boiled eggs with crafty designs – the little boy calls this oval eggs. 

I found some cute and crafty designs for boiled eggs and other meals on the web. Look how interesting a simple sandwhich or boiled egg can look. Kids will surely love to munch on these.

photo credit

Care to share more baon ideas? Moms and Dads need as much ideas to last the whole school year :)

Allergy Free Mom

I had history of asthma. My last asthma attack was when I was about 7 or 8. I can't remember my exact age then but I remember every detail of that moment because it was my father's birthday and I was alone with my mom on the second floor of our house missing out on all the fun. Yeah, asthma is such a kill joy.

I'm happy to say that I somehow outgrew asthma. Thanks to my parents and to all natural diet. But I guess having a weak respiratory at birth and having it in the genes made me acquire allergic rhinitis since I can't remember when.

This post is all about my allergic rhinitis journey and I'm sharing with you in the hope that it will bring awareness and help to those who suffer the same condition.

What triggers the allergies? Upon careful observation, I believed that dust mites and pollen get me sneezing nonstop for days. This has been my observation for years but somehow I can’t totally prove it because a visit to the park sometimes trigger an attack, sometimes not. 

At times the allergy gets worse and turns to colds and cough especially during summer seasons or crazy weather like we have now. I would cure the cough and cold with OTC drugs only to get exposed to the allergens again. It's a vicious cycle. As much as I don’t want to depend on meds, I usually have no choice.

So to help me from an attack, I make sure I have zero (if possible) exposure to dust mites. Everything in the house has to be squeaky clean (from the floor to the ceiling). No furniture or houshold items that attract dust fast like carpet or furry stuff (and animals!). Even the bed needs to be cleaned and vacuumed every week or as often as possible. Too much work I know but I just have to live with it (thank God for helpers). 

Until I found a life changing solution to the problem.

After years of continues research and hits and missess to cure my allergies, I found a study that made me give up one major part of human diet - dairy products. Vegan advocates and experts insists that dairy is not food for humans. This information didn’t get my attention right away because I knew what I’m really allergic to anyway.

Then one morning, out of curiosity and ‘there’s no harm in trying’ mindset, I decided to give no-dairy diet a try for a few weeks – almond milk instead of cow’s milk for cereals, no cheese in breads or dishes, even no breads (especially wheat)! Since I can’t drink coffee without milk and sugar I just decided to stop drinking coffee at all. My chocolate intake has been dark ever since. I’m a huge fan of dark chocolate anyway and milk chocolates make my throat scratchy. 

The result? I haven’t had any allergic attack since the start of the year. Zero. Nada. There are sneezes every now but it never got as far as a rhinitis attack anymore. How cool is that? I only wish I discovered this very life changing information earlier.

I'm thinking that it I may not be allergic to ALL dairy products but eating less of it made my immune system stronger that I'm able to fight off allergy attacks whenever I'm exposed to the allergens. 

Just to prove how effective (almost) dairy-free diet is in curing the allergic me, I exposed myself to dustmites and didn't request the helpers to vacuum the bed for weeks. In fairness, just one or two sneezes last week but that's about it. No more teary eyes, red nose, headache and runny nose for months! That's a real feat for me :) And yeah, last month we bought our very first living room carpet, they real furry one :)

Slowly, I'm making my kids eat less dairy because the doctor says they have the tendency to acquire the same respiratory problem and allergy as I. Although they are voracious consumers of cheese, wheaning them slowly made them not crave for cheese anymore. For this year, they haven't been to the doctor for colds, fever or cough. Double feat for us!

To date, we still have some dairy products in our fridge like the kids’ milk, flour, etc. Our house is not yet dairy-proof, I don’t know when we will get to that part. Maybe if there will more alternatives available in the market or maybe in time. Sometimes I can get almond milk in store but most times it's out of stock and I still can't find organic butter in local stores.

We are taking this route one step at a time. I am also on the look out for gluten-free recipes like the Flourless Cake recipe I shared here. I hope to find more healthy recipes that my family will enjoy. 

This month of May is Food Allergy month and I hope every year, more valuable information and research will come out to help people suffering from allergy. I hope our local market will deliver more organic and gluten-free, dairy-free products (at a reasonable price) so Filipinos will have healthier alternatives.

Pamora Farm: Better Option For Our Family

We always say that a commodity is a result of a need. When there is a need, some genius out there will think of creating a product to meet the need.

For the case of Gerard Papillon and wife Tina, all they wanted was a perfectly roasted chicken, just like how they do it in Gerard's hometown in France. Living in Manila, sadly, he couldn’t find a good chicken for his roast recipe. Then, with all the light bulbs lighting in his head – he and his amiable wife combined age-old technique and  technology (Gerard having a background in construction) established Pamora Farm.

This couple is truly a force to reckon with. They started out selling 50 chickens in 2002 and now  supplies 6,000 chickens to different parts of the country. There is increasing demand from other countries like Japan, Thailand, US. Why? Because they are the only company that produces genuine free-range chicken in Asia. You do the math.

photo c/o Pamora

So how to they do this? In their farm in Abra, they practice the old ways of rearing chicken feeding them only milled yellow corn and other organic food found in the farm (grass, insects, etc.). When the chickens get sick, they are treated the natural way too with different type of herbal medicines that the farm grows. No pesticides, no chemicals as much as possible. Honest to goodness organic farming, that's what Pamora Farm is all about. It brings organic free-range chicken to our tables and a livelihood for the locals of Abra.

Their chicks take about 3 months to grow and ready for the market as compared to the genetically grown chickens. They don’t  shortcut the process, even their spring chicken takes longer to grow – 56 days. It's always quality over quantity for them. They truly deserve the approval of BFAD and NMIS (National Meat Inspection Service and be certified with GMP (Good Manufacturing Practices)

Why all this hassle when they can take the quicker route to money-making? Because these entrepreneurs think like consumers too. They want to deliver products that they know they will serve their families too - safe, organic and fresh. They even have the individually quick frozen (IQF) chicken products in which each chicken part is frozen individually to make small cooking more convenient for consumers. Much like the frozen peas and carrots we find in the market, notice how they never bunch up in one ice block when frozen? Same concept is used to IQF chicken. The advocacy really is endearing and admirable.

The couple were such great host to a sumptuous meal last weekend at Brasserie Cicou in Greenhills. They served dishes using only Pamora chicken and eggs. The pates were to die for (I particularly liked the chicken liver pate). This product is another fusion of local products and French recipe (from Gerard's grandmother).

medium-sized free-range chicken eggs

Just a few of the pate selection - chicken liver, chicken breast and chicken liver and gizzard. The mangoes among other fruits, herbs and vegetables are organically grown in Pamora farm. 

 

We were able to enjoy their spring chicken, seasoned simply and roasted to perfection. The crème brulee selection of green tea, vanilla and chocolate were to die for, perfect dessert to cap off a lunch of engaging stories and new insights. Honestly, I came home inspired to do my part in making a better future for my kids. I cannot help but wish that the passion and advocacy of this couple rubs on me.

 Compliments to the chef. The creme brulee won our hearts :)

Now, Gerard and Tina cook their perfectly roasted chicken. No fuss, no worry.

Pamora chicken,eggs and pate can be purchased from these stores:

Santis Delicatessen, Rustan’s and Shopwise, Terry Selection, Market! Market!

 Visit their site too:

http://www.pamorafarm.com

My New Project: Entry # 4

Last night was session 2 of my belly dancing workout. Gladly, I was more confident with the moves and was able to somehow isolate the body parts that only needs to twirl, bump or shake. Again, I felt my abs stiffen for like three times during the session. Belly dancing is still on the level of HARD for me especially, I think, because it's a fitness/dance class. Nice experience, though. I felt totally worked out and love the last part when we get to do a choreograph for one song :)

For those who wants to try the class, visit ACTS Dance Academy website:  http://www.actsacademy.com/ to know about the classes they offer.
This academy has one small studio in GA Tower1 in Mandaluyong City. They offer curriculum-based dance classes so I guess that qualifies them to be an academy. What I like about this place is that it's just one MRT ride away from work (near Boni station) so I can be there in 20 minutes, just in time to do the shimmy shimmy. Don't have to drive myself to traffic. What I wish would improve is the restroom, it's okay but could be better. 

The Family's Secret Weapon

Husband calls this langis na pampabuhay (oil that resurrects). 

If he has a headache, I rub his head with this oil and he feels better. Body pain, stomach pain, sore throat, colds, cough, abdominal pain and even tooth ache. This is the family's first line of defense. 

Krystal Herbal Oil is actually an influence of my mom. She is an active El Shaddai member and the owner of this brand Dr. Fely Guy Ong sells and promotes this product on the fellowship's radio program (DWXI) and main office in Amorsolo, Makati City. My family has been using this oil and the other products of this brand for decades now. 

What I love about this product is that it's 100% natural. It's main ingredients are banaba, mango, alagaw, guava. Anything natural, I'm all for it. The scent reminds me always of Splash hairspray.

The trick here is to know how and when to massage this on your body so you get the best possible result. Since my mom is an avid (and effective) advocate of herbal products and natural medicine, she also guides me on how to use this oil (along with prayers and faith) to a sick family member. 

I bought this one just last weekend in Cartimar branch. P350 for 30ml bottle. My last bottle just emptied out and I can't live without this at home so I immediately bought one.

What's your family's secret weapon? 

I Love to Read... Medicine Info Leaflets

Are you one of those moms who read that leaflet included inside a box of medicine? I do.

Although I don't understand probably half of it, I still read it from start to finish and see if there are any contraindications that I should be aware of and the doctor forgot to mention.
My husband always tells me not to play doctor but I guess I'm just stubborn. Actually, personally I'm the kind na kung kaya pa ang pain, I don't take any meds. I have high tolerance for pain so if I have headache or allergic rhinitis attack, I will sleep it through if possible. Tiis ganda just so I don't have to take those chemicals called meds. I believe anything not natural has a side effect. Praning much?
Of course, I don't deduct the fact that we still need medicine especially for ailments that really requires it. Like just last week, Sophie had kuliti (sty) and she looked like she had a fight with Pacquiao. Her left eye was really swollen (but still refuse to be absent from school, baka hanapin daw siya ng teacher niya). We brought her to the doctor and was prescribed an antibiotic drops for the eye. The sty was caused by bacteria that entered the eye (my number one suspect are the colored chalks she just can't get enough of).
Before I actually administered the meds on my girl, I read the leaflet just to make sure it's generally safe for kids. Thank goodness no side effect that's worrisome.

It's her 6th day today with the antibiotics and tomorrow we are scheduled for a follow up check up.

The little girl has learned her lesson well. No more scratching the eyes, nose or ears when hands are dirty. And yes, even a cute pink-colored chalk is dirty.
Good thing the little girl is very independent and responsible. I never realized how much she paid attention while I cleaned her eyes the first time until the yaya reported the the following day, Sophie cleaned her eyes herself while mommy is at work.

...

Sorry about this post but I'm feeling a bit low again. I feel like I need to be somewhere else right now. No, not in another shoe sale. That last one gave me a very short-lived happiness.
I will not try to expound too much. Just feel like I need a looong break from everything and everyone.

Anyway, just an update from this last Post. Before actually deciding on what course to take (Shockwave or medication), I took another advice from a different Urologist in a different hospital. Since my ultrasound was a month old, he told he to have another KUB ultrasound and I did just that. Turned out, the stone was bigger on this new ultrasound. However, according to my new doctor, the stone is too small for a shockwave treatmeant. he also does not advice it at this point since it has an effect on the kidney (the pounding and pressure that the treatment that is). He gave me a medication called URAL which is supposed to help breakdown the stones and hopefully those tiny bits will go pass my body with my wee wee. He recommended the powder form of URAL instead of capsules as the former is more effective. I need to take it 3 times a day for a month. I'm down to my last 1 1/2 weeks of the taking medicine which is like salt water by the way. After which, I'm back to the ultrasound guys to see if there's any improvement. Here's to hoping that my kidney gets clear of those bothersome stones. That will surely give me a nice lift in the spirits.
My only happy thought, I can still eat grapes. I still need to avoid coffee, chocolates, strawberries, peanuts and spinach, rhubarb though.

Last month I was diagnosed to have a kidney stone. The stone is lodged somewhere at the center of my kidney and about 0.5 cm in diameter. This was confirmed through a KUB ultrasound and urinalysis. Scary and bothersome? That’s what I felt too when I first found out about it.

Okay, so I did not just go to a doctor and said, ‘Doc, can you give me a request for a kidney ultrasound. I just feel like it’. Weeks prior to that, I have been feeling a bit of heaviness in my left side, somewhere along the waistline. It has actually been recurring months apart but not really painful (no sting, no throbbing), more like constipated feeling. You know the feeling when sometimes your chock load of s*&^ won’t come off for days? That’s the feeling. Mind you, my bowel and urine movement are normal.

The pain eventually came when I had another UTI (urinary track infection) attack days after. My last one was around last year and that time I was already given a recommendation to see a nephrologist (kidney specialist) and a urologist (urine specialist) as something else maybe causing the UTI to recur. I shrugged that off after the antibiotics cured me.

So now, I think it came back with a vengeance.

After interpreting my ultrasound result, my nephro gave me two options on how to get rid of the stones:

1. Extracorporeal shock wave lithotripsy or ESWL – some mistakenly call this as Laser treatment but according to the doctor, laser is not used but rather a shock wave which aims to break or crash the stone into pieces (non surgical procedure). The broken stones should pass through my body when I urinate. It could be painful (or not depending on the size of the stones) as there are bits and pieces that will pass through very small ureter and urethra. Ouch. This is an out patient procedure but one will feel like he's been through a boxing match after. Para kang nakipagsuntukan sa 3 boksingero! so rest is needed after the treatment.  
2. Medication – I will be given a medication which will help flush out the stone off my body. However, the medicine will not help minimize or breakdown the stone so there is a great possibility that it will come out the same size at it was diagnosed. Double ouch!

Fast forward to today, three weeks I saw my doctor and I still haven’t decided which route to take. I’m planning to consult a urologist also. I’m planning to have a repeat ultrasound. I’m planning to leave it to fate and just wait till it naturally flushes out of my body one fine day. Actually, I think these are just my delaying tactics, delaying the inevitable. But seriously, a second opinion is top of mind. One happy thought for now: for my case surgery is not necessary.

Meanwhile, I am following some herbalist (named MOM) advice and bought kugon or cogon root, boiled them and drank the extremely bitter juice everyday. It is believed to help flush out kidney stones since its diuretic. It can also treat UTI and even arthritis. My husband was skeptical, ‘That’s your poison’ he would say but I drink it anyway.

The doctor also prescribed me Sambong capsules while I think things over. It has the same medicinal value as cogon root.

http://www.filipinoherbshealingwonders.filipinovegetarianrecipe.com/kugon.htm

Husband also bought me a 1.3L jug which I should bring to work. I have the tendency to forgo drinking water or taking a wee break if I get too engrossed at work. With the constant supply of water, I have no reason to forget drinking water. 

Doctor says each person should be drinking 8-12 glasses of water each day, plus 2 glasses for every cup of coffee we drink. Add more water if you have regular physical activity like running, aero,etc.

 Right now, I have to avoid also food that are high in calcium oxalate as this is the mineral found in my urine. So what's bawal? Beets, spinach (my fave), peanuts (my diet snack), grapes (my fave), wheat germ/bran (my fave), green pepper (which I always use for pasta meals) and red meat. It's basically avoiding the things that I love to eat :( Oh, I forgot, chocolates, coffee and cola are no no too. Geesh! 

I'm giving myself a few more weeks to decide. Hope I make the right (and brave) move.