Monday, August 1, 2011

Defiant Man

He's only two years old, barely two and a half years old but he thinks like a big man now. He never forgets to speak his mind (his voice is more resounding now in the house than his Ate). Most of all, I noticed how defiant he is when he simply doesn't agree with something. Example:

Me: Hey Sam, look at the helicopter?
Sam: No Mommy, it's an airplane
Me: Baby, that's helicopter
Sam : Nooo mommy, airplane! Hhhhrrrr...
Me: gives up. it's airplane for now. (mantra: choose your battle and choose it well)


Sam in one of his rare quiet moments. Do. Not. Be. Deceived.
When things get worse and we have to put him in time out, he usually doesn't cry like his Ate did in this stage. He holds his tears or pretends the timeout doesn't affect/bother him. See?

Defiance is part of being in the terrible two stage. I had several experiences with my first child (she had outgrown defiance but still very opinionated until now, by the way). It's just really frustrating at times and if you don't know any better, you will just want to haul them!
To effectively deal with kids two years of age, it's very very important to understand them and know where they're coming from. For my first child, she just won't leave my side even if I'm in the kitchen chopping, frying, steaming, etc. There was no way I could get her out of the kitchen so instead of us fighting over it, I gave her simple tasks to do like beat the egg, mix the batter, etc. Thus, she learned to cook at an early age. Now, at age 4, she knows how to cut onions and tomatoes the safe way and can make her own pancake mix (yaya or mommy does the cooking still :) ).

Research also helps a lot especially for first time parents. This site has handy tips for parents:

http://www.babycenter.com/0_defiance-why-it-happens-and-what-to-do-about-it_63678.bc

Be understanding.
Set limits.
Reinforce good behavior.
Use time-outs — positively.
Empower your 2-year-old. 

Choose your battles. 
Respect her age and stage.

2 comments:

kim said...

right you are! i'm so glad that i'm already way passed that stage, take note, i've been through that stage 3x for my 3 kids, lol!

march on... said...

congrats kim! I'm looking forward to to next year when he turns three. thunderous 3 naman...

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